Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Time

Do you ever wish you could go back in time and change anything? I do. There are so many things I would change. First off, I wouldn’t have liked his status. If I didn’t like that status, he wouldn’t have messaged me, I never would have gone over, and I wouldn't have left with this empty feeling inside. I would have never sung to what’s-his-name at that certain workshop. If I never sang to him, I would have never wished so badly that I could live down there, just to see if we would have actually worked out a healthy relationship. I wouldn’t have dated that douchebag. I wouldn’t be so screwed up about guys and relationships.  The list goes on and on.
But every now and then, I get this thought: what if it all happened for a reason? Determinism. Everything is planned out ahead of time. What if I was meant to have met those people, acted the way I acted, without free will? Did God want me to do all of this?
And if it so…why do I always end up with the jerks?

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